Letting go of anger

Letting go of anger

Anger is an emotion, and emotions are meant to be short-lived. Excitement, fear, sadness, surprise, irritation- all are emotions that pass through a person all day. But for some people, anger persists, and through its persistence, anger causes harm. It is very important, for their health, that these people let go of this stored anger. Here are some solutions that will help to drop the anger habit.

Living without resolution

If you are the kind of person who holds on to anger until you can resolve the problem that caused it in the first place then you have to know that it is a great approach if you are dealing with a solvable problem. But if the problem can’t be resolved at all – or at least not completely, then what purpose does the anger serve? Many conflicts and situations will be encountered by you in life that, despite your best efforts will not have a happy or desired outcome, in such cases, you will have to live with these problems- without resolution. If anger is not the solution, if it can’t undo what’s been done then it is time to let it go.

Dr. Prerna Kohli, India's Top Psychologist Explains Anger Management
Dr. Prerna Kohli, India’s Top Psychologist Explains Anger Management

Accepting rather than suppressing anger

  If you have ever tried to repress a thought then you would have experienced that the more you resist the thought, the more it persists. In other words, the attempt to repress the thought usually backfires. It’s the same with emotions like anger. The more you tell yourself- “I’m not mad”, the longer you stay mad. Here are some steps that will help you to let the anger go.

•    Identify the source of your anger- what time, place or person was the cause of your anger? How long ago was this?

•    Acknowledge your angry feelings- say aloud, “I’m angry because……”, then decide how angry you are.

•    Legitimize your anger- you tell yourself that you have the right to feel emotions like anger. You don’t have to justify your anger.

•    Give yourself permission to express anger if you can think of a potentially useful outcome- you can express anger in a lot of constructive ways. It is not always to be associated with violence, rudeness and incivility.

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